2011 Melbourne Cup Name Guide – How Your Horse Will Go

You might consider it an irrelevant aspect to the form guide but the fact is the 2011 Melbourne Cup horse names play a huge role in determining the winner.

Sure you can write it off as superstitious black magic but you tell us why Halloween was the day before the Melbourne Cup then, coincidence? We think not!

Below is the complete guide to the Melbourne Cup horse names and what role they will have on determining the winner.


Niwot is a clever name, but it's not the name that will win the 2011 Melbourne Cup

Think to yourself, do you really want to be cheering a horse home in the final 200m when you can’t even pronounce its name? Do you really want to be putting your faith in a horse that on the most basic level as been likened to an inebriated seamen? Didn’t think so, check out our Melbourne Cup names guide to make sure you’re not stuck with a pompous pony in the race that stops a nation.

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Melbourne Cup 2011 – What’s In A Name?


You need to think ahead with your Melbourne Cup tips, where will I be and what condition will I be in by the time those gates open.

Probably half tanked with a mouth full of quality fried goods so pronunciation is everything.

Because of this any horse that can’t be easily articulated with half a pie stuck in your gob is instantly withdrawn.

That means no Saptapadi, no Lucas Cranach and for the love of god no Moyenne Corniche.

It’s not just pronunciation that’s the key, it’s the ability to shout for your horse while the race is still going.

That means any more than two words is a simple no no because the race will be over by the time you get it out.

See ya later to At First Sight and Older Than Time and Lost In The Moment.

From here we need to dismiss any horses that have names that don’t mean anything, sure in their home country it may have very noble origins, but we’re  in Australia and this is an Australian race, so we’re speaking Australian!

Unfortunately that means bye bye to defending champion Americain and his fellow Frenchy Dunaden.

Manighar can join them on the scrap heap in company with Mourayan, Illo and Modun.

Before you accuse us of being racist we’re aware a couple of the Aussie trained runners have questionable tags as well, so unfortunately Shamrocker is gone, Tullamore is gone and Niwot, while very cleverly being named ‘to win’ backwards, must also get the chop.

We’re also not happy about Red Cadeaux, any horse that uses strange excess letters to make a sound that would much easier be done with a simple ‘o’ is trying too hard for our liking.

That leaves just eight horses left battling for Melbourne Cup supremacy, but the road is about to end for a few more.

Names mean more than just being able to say them and know what they mean, they also produce different feelings inside us.

We’d prefer those feelings to be positive and beautiful, so anything that does the opposite just won’t do.

The Verminator then is something we want nowhere near us and we sure as hell won’t be going within 100 feet of Unusual Suspect.

The Drunken Sailor is another character we could do without meeting and given we’ve heard he likes to holiday on Hawk Island he’s gone as well.

Over in England the killing of innocent animals may be tolerated but in Australia we’re simply appalled by Fox Hunt.

As for Glass Harmonium, he might have been good on Saturday but over 3200m he’s just too brittle and likely to crack.

That leaves two horses, the last two in the running to win the 2011 Melbourne Cup and the glory and prestige that comes along with it.

Which will it be?

Well, we saw Bart’s horse run last year, it sucked, so on Precedence the King won’t be getting win number 13 in 2011.

That leaves Jukebox Jury as the 2011 Melbourne Cup champion.

It’s fitting really given that after the race is done you’ll likely tottle off to the nearest watering hole, find We Are The Champion’s on the jukebox in the corner and sing at the top of your lungs with all your new friends.

Jukebox Jury – Melbourne Cup winner 2011


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UPDATE: Mourayan has been scratched from the Melbourne Cup, see, we’re going well already!